Monday, August 06, 2007

The "Other" Nemesis Next Door

For those of you who are avid readers of my blog, you will all recall how last year the horrid neighbor to our right called Animal Control and then the Cops on me for allegedly barking in an incessant fashion. I don't want to dwell on it, but suffice to say that relations are now "cordial" - the parents greet him and vice versa (sometimes). I still scowl at him. I do not forgive him easily for the stress he put us through calling the authorities...

To make matters worse for me - said horrid neighbor has an equally HORRID cat. Now I would like to know why female dogs are called bitches, female humans are called bitches, but there are no such names for female cats? If ever there was a cat who earned the title BITCH, it is Blanche the Cat, spawn of horrid neighbor to our right.

From my earliest days here, Blanche has been nasty to me. She was the first cat I encountered. She would pretend to be friendly, drop to the ground near my feet, roll over in an overt expression of "come and play with me". Then the minute I got near, WHAM, she would jump up and swipe me with her fierce clawed feet and emit this horrible hissing sound! The first time it happened I was a wee pup and I nearly died of fright. Since then, I cross the street to avoid her on my walks and keep my distance. Isn't it funny how horrible neighbor would have horrible cat...
(Luckily Gracie's feline siblings and Pepper-Ricky's feline siblings, were kind and nice, so I don't have this horrid impression of all cats, just Blanche!)

So yesterday, the parents are I were hanging out outside. I had my leash on but I wasn't tethered to the railing as Mom and Dad were right next to me and I never run away anyway...I have matured. I was just minding my business on the sidewalk, when Blanche pounced on the end of my leash and commenced taking it in her paw like she was going to take me for a walk!! I shuddered at the thought!

I didn't know what to do! I looked pleadingly to the parents for help, but they were laughing! Loudly! So I faked bravado, and jumped towards her and (after checking for traffic) ran after her into the road!
And still she persisted in trying to grab my leash. Well, by this time, I was so mad, I growled at her and ran away! I will never understand that freaky feline - was she trying to be friendly or was she trying to ambush me, grab my leash and take me somewhere like the railway tracks down the road. I could totally see her tying me to the tracks. Maybe horrid neighbor has programmed her to commit nefarious deeds upon my "person".

What do you think? I'd especially like to hear from dogs who live with cats!



Gus said...

I think it is the scariest thing I ever heard! You be very careful around that cat, they are very devious aminals.

Joe the Cat said...

Female cats are called "Queens" and males are "Toms."
At least now you have some terms and you can begin a dialogue.
I have lived with between one and three wire fox terriers for eleven years now, and count many dogs as my friends. At some point you and your neighbor will reach an understanding; you can bet on it.

Koobuss said...

Hi Axel,

I don't live with any cats, but I do live next door to one and we are not on speaking terms. I bark at him whenever I can, but he just ignores me, as though I'm not even there. It's awful when they don't take you seriously. I get no respet.

Koobuss Kiises,

Nigel said...

Refer to your neighbor as "Queen Blanche" and maybe you can reach a detente.
Half my life was spent sans cats, but during the next half I lived with Joe. For several years I didn't quite understand him and often tried to sit on him. Joe did the Gandhi thing. He's a pacifist, you see. Well, so was I. We shared a philosophy. By the end of my life, when I became blind and infirm, Joe walked by me and often sat with me. He was a true brother. If you ignore cats, you could be ignoring opportunities for friendship.

Scruffy & Lacie said...

Hey Axel!! I can't believe that feline was trying to "walk" you; cats can be sneaky, you know! My hooman sister (Cat Woman) has 2 of them. They have visited me several times. I love them, and they hate me. It's fun to make them get all puffy and hissy. I did eat one of their fake mice. Threw it up one week later, naked. The mouse I mean...all the fur and tail was strangely missing after journeying to my gastric regions. Lacie loves cats,too. Hey Axel, thanks for taking MY SIDE about the ear glueing. Mom looked darn guilty when she looked at the adorable ear club pix. Oh, and she joined like you said to!! Your the best...Scruff

William Tell said...

I suspect he was going to push you out into traffic, but who knows for sure? Some cats are quite devious.

Living on a farm, Mom keeps several barn cats around for mouse control. I keep telling her that I would do the same job and save her the kitty chow. Just turn me loose and watch me go!

William Tell

Asta said...

That sounds tewwifying...I don't know any catses, and I'm pwetty suwe I'm scawed of them..especially after this stowy..pleez be caweful awound that bitchy cat..I shudder at the thought of you being kidnapped by her...
smoochie kisses

Jackson said...

Hey Axel, watch out, you don't want to be kitnapped! J x

LANCELOT said...

Oh, that Blanche does look evil! I saw the devil's horns and everything! I have a similar stray running around my territory, and she's even bigger than I am - She's like a mutant kitty or something! I'll never understand kitties.

Mommy wanted to thank you for the good advice on my blog! I'm feeling better now, and I sure did learn my lesson bout not drinking foreign things around the yard! Mommy also said she's heard about the fox terrier network membership, and she's planning to join via snail mail. Do the dues cover a one year membership? We're excited to become a part of the club!

Well, Paws out!

Asta said...

Tell your Mommi that the video Mommi uses is on her camewa..she
loooves her's a SONY Cyber-shot 8.1 with a Zeiss's
got a hooge scween and is all touch scween vewy easy to use..hope that
Our fwiends own a sewies of houses all next to each other,that they
bought for their extended family over the yeaws on Lake Seneca in
upstate NY in's kind of far, but vewy bootiful..we were
vewy lucky to be invited.
You'll see me in the water soonest, I wish you had been along to
encouwage me, cause Bobo just made fun of me and didn't swim and just
bawked her head off.
smoochie kisses
pee ess.I twied to send this pee mail, but it got bounced back,sowwy
my pee mail is

Ricky Pepper said...

Some cats are meanies, but you are right, my kitties are super nice :)


fee said...

i meet several meows when i go for my walks but we never say a thing to each other because mom always drags me away quickly. but i do think that some creatures are better ignored.

Asta said...

Thanks fow the compliment. Once I got ovew my initial fear it was yummy in the water, and I did it twice a day..I wish I could be there now with you and we could play.
pee ess Mommi couldn't find out any mowe about the stoopid video machine, she's a ninny.
smoochie kisses

Gus said...

Axel: we will do In n Out burgers when we get home. There is one about a mile and a half from the house, another reason to come visit,

Pacco de Mongrel said...

i'm scared of cats too....but i'll still gv them a good chase...juz try avoid being scratch by them

Bogart said...


I live with 4 cats. Most of the time they like me, occasionally I get a swat.

That photo with the devil horns made mom laugh really hard... and the way that Blanche is making a play for the leash is pretty hilarious. Cats are pretty darned smart and they have a LOT of time on their hands... you guys will work it out.


Luna "The Scruffy Yacht Dog" said...


I love that picture of your evil neighbor cat. We have an evil cat in our neighborhood, played all friendly with me then swatted me with her evil paws "B&%^$H"!!! I walk on the other side of the street. Other cats that run I terrorize. My friend Moie has feline brothers and a sister, they don't bother me.

Keep calling the little evil feilines bluff. Maybe one day she'll flinch and then she's yours.