Thursday, October 06, 2005

Death to all Halloween Scarecrows

I have to admit, Rosh Hashana is not all that it is cracked up to be. Besides the tiny bit of honey Mom gave me to celebrate, I spent both nights at home while Mom and Dad went out for dinner and festivities. When they finally got home and I was dying to play, they were so bloated from all the food they'd imbibed, they wanted to go straight to sleep. The nerve! I think that's what my people call chutzpah!

It was however nice to have Mom home from work, and we enjoyed many walks and playtime. (We also watched Million Dollar Baby, and boy was I chuffed that Hilary Swank's character's dog's name was also Axel!) My favorite thing is to sit on Mom's lap in our yard and have her hold my chew toy while I bite it. Dad thinks it's the ultimate in laziness, that I can't even hold my own chew toy, but Mom gets a kick out of my snuggling on her lap like a baby.

A few weeks ago, Mom came home with a scarecrow on a stick that she planted in the outside flowerpot by our front door. She bought it to create a minimalistic Halloween look. I don't know why exactly, but I really hate that ugly little straw man! Every time I go out for a walk, I try to grab it, but for the longest time Mom or Dad yanked my leash and I haven't been able to get it. Until yesterday! I distracted Dad for a second and managed to grab the scarecrow and run inside with it. Man I was happy! I climbed onto the couch, between two pillows (to protect me from parental incursions) and proceeded to dismember the hated scarecrow. I tore off his head, pulled out all the straw and just had a bloody marvelous time as you can see below!

Did you know that in Afrikaans (that's one of the languages spoken in Mom's country of her birth, South Africa) a dog is called a "hond"? Well, in today's Washington Post I read an interesting article that made my tail wag. The car manufacturer, HONDA (coincidence? I think not), has designed a car that's friendly for dogs! Does this mean I may get to drive soon? Alas no.

It seems the car has "a special crate for dogs in the glove compartment [which] allows owners to interact with their pets while driving. A bigger crate pops up from the floor in the back seat area and can be folded back into the floor when it's not needed."

It's all very cool that Honda is now thinking of us dogs, but c'mon dudes, who wants to ride in the frigging glove compartment? We want to travel freely with our heads out the window! I think Honda should consult with a few canines on their next project - I would envision creating some sort of window box to travel in!

Of course this would never apply to us Wires, but just in case you know an ugly dog, is advertising it's search for the world's ugliest dog - if you recall I posted the current title holder on my blog a while back. The competition ad states, "Let's see 'um folks, bring those hairy, bald, smushed, droopy, wet, sloppy, entirely lovable pooch faces our way."
Lovable indeed. Yuck.

To prove my point, that we Wires would never in a zillion years qualify for that contest, I wanted to share a beautiful pic of my Canadian pal Colby who looks so handsome as he poses in front of his fireplace. Way to go Master Colby! Wish I was that hunky - unfortunately, I am an avowed scruffball most of the time!